A Coaching Power Tool Created by Zhi Hui Ni
(life coach, CHINA China)
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Emotional concepts:
Emotional, speaking on the Chinese word formation, the first impression it gives is “emotional nature, feel the nature.” Chinese Dictionary explanation: “I feel the role of the human sense organs arising, such as visual perception and representation of knowledge , as opposed to ” rational . “emotional generally understood to be: With Sensory perception, basic determined by personal feelings , and did not think deeply and do basic first impression judgments. (quoted from [Baidu library])
Like a mighty river sensual, full of changes and ups and downs. As human beings we have a rich and complex emotions. It is here and the natural expression of our subconscious, reveal our values and belief in the potential of the emotions, sensibility is straightforward and concrete, sensuous is our natural choice, a way without thinking. Everyone wants their own emotional life, to express their emotions and feelings, because most natural, easy, easy.
Rational concepts:
Rational thinking is based on the results of normal behavior. Generally refers to the concept of rationality, judgment, reasoning and other thinking-shaped type or development activities. Meaning and a sense of the relative. Sociological perspective, rational means to identify, judge, assess people’s behavior as well as practical reasons meets the specific purpose of intelligence and other aspects. Discover the truth through rational argument and the argument persuasive, logical reasoning rather than by relying on the appearance and draw conclusions, opinions and reasons for action. (Quoted from [Baidu library])
Reason is like a river, smooth and calm. When we get along with yourself or others, reason will play an important role. Reason to help us find not the best, is the most appropriate; than most wanted, is the most important. Work, we hope that through rational, based on objective facts and logical analysis of the needs and changes in the development of our direction and strategy.
Emotional association words: affection, compassion, and values.
Feelings:
When feelings when we are in, easy to fall into emotional. Time with loved ones, lovers, children, friends and other people feelings of deep conflict, like a powerful torrent of emotions difficult to control. We tend to be inductive away, deviate from the original intention, hurt exports.
Of course, when we are in the good feelings, the product will be a strong warm, make us feel happy, grateful, lucky.
Sympathy
Impressed each other, resonate emotionally, hope reaching out to help each other solve problems.
Values
Values are our judgment. Consistent values make us feel comfortable. Like-minded friends, the couple enjoy each other through thick and thin colleagues let us cherish. Instead, dubious friends, couples with no common language, adding insult to injury colleagues will make people feel uncomfortable.
Rational related words: reason, empathy, distance.
Reason
Let us reason to prioritize, focus focus discharge order, targeted. No reason is too cold will make people feel emotionally numb, it is difficult to stimulate intrinsic motivation.
Similarly
Understand each other’s situation, rational analysis, to help each other to find solutions.
Distance
Rational need to maintain a certain distance to look at things in a spectator’s perspective on the issue. Strong sense of distance, feeling strange, lack of trust and dependence.
Self-application
In our brains, often there are two animals fighting, a hub out and stopped him at the door of a big power who, whoever won. This is our emotional and rational struggle. When we are emotional, it is a release, our joy, sadness, anger, excitement is emotional catharsis. Vent to make us feel comfortable. Sensual movement by heart and brain, resulting in heart and filled in the brain. Reason is brain activity, through rational analysis, reflection, evaluation, and make the appropriate decision. Reason is the convergence of action, people quiet, sober, objective and comprehensive.
I am a very responsible person, will ask himself the job done faster and better. But at work, or often urge my superiors, “how about the progress of work, when completed?, I want to get the results as soon as possible!” “I need to know the progress, please report immediately to the middle of my hair look.” Previously, whenever this time, I am very angry. “I know nothing about how superior he think I am man, arguably the gas!” “Reminders several times a day, I have to say is doing ah, I really hate to tell you!.” When my heart was so emotional and assuming control, I am very angry, irritable.
After reflection, I decided to face this problem rationally. Let yourself calm down, ask yourself: Do I have often urged the men do? What do they feel? Not because I do not trust them, but I can not see their progress, do not know when it can be completed. After this adjustment, he felt easier to accept. As a higher level of empathy, I would choose the same meaning with a mild tone to express my intentions reasonable. When men feel superior understanding and urgency of the situation, they will take the initiative with the completion. This is a combination of emotional and rational way. Task is rational, communication is emotional, deadline is rational, trust is emotional. Not only rational, because people have feelings; sensibility not only because of the need to face reality.
Flight attendants on the plane did not adjust the seat to treat customers usually a gentle reminder “Sir, seat back adjustment to the” decisive action while using an adjustment in place to help the passengers. This is an example of a combination of emotional and rational.
How to confirm their lives in emotional or rational
- Your body passed what information, breathing, brain, heart, what reaction?
- At this point, you can give an objective and impartial judge it?
- What do you feel positive or negative capability in approaching it?
- You can laugh naturally do, tomorrow you have confidence?
- You are now able to achieve the status and practice your purpose?
(Above problems from ICA courseware)
Think
- What kind of things you easy sensibility, what kind of easy rational
- Emotional and rational approach over what impact on you
- Emotional and rational coexistence can do
Coaching Application
Emotional and rational coaching process is a very interesting subject. From a practical standpoint, customers and coaches need to have the qualities of both emotional and rational.
As a coach:
If there is no rational not awake, not calm, not decisive, can not keep their distance, can not lead customers to move forward.
If there is no sensibility can not be established easily, an atmosphere of trust, lack of incentives and recognition, and even judges, undermines confidence.
As customers:
If there is no rational can not practice what they preach, not self-reflection, does not analyze the pros and cons, caught complaining, stagnant.
If there is no emotional inner voice can not be heard, the lack of self-awareness and self-recognition, less fun and dynamic life.
Coach rational
Including calm, keep a distance, slow down, do not explore the evaluation, clarification of faith, commitment and confirmation of the action.
Rational questions:
1, you confirm that this method can achieve your goals?
2, then what action you plan to do?
3, do not do it have any effect on you?
4, which is more important topic for you?